General Bush Defends Sec'y Rumsfeld

Adding her name to the growing list of Generals coming out in support of Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld's handling of Operation Iraqi Liberation, Gen. Barbara Bush (US Army Special Reserves) spoke to reporters from her office in the Do-Decagon yesterday. "Uncle Don, like, is totally doing a way good job of being the boss of war. Just (be)cause those retired dinosaur guys say he isn't, is just (be)cause they're jealous old dinosaur relics of, like, the Civil War mentalogy. Today's Army is totally modern and needs modern thinkers like Uncle Don," stated the bright young star, who rose to the rank of General, having acquired 11 medals, including the Vietnam Service Medal, during Army Basic Training. On her meteoric rise through the ranks, Gen. Bush said, "I know what everybody thinks, like my Daddy or Uncle Don helped me, but it's not true. I did it with hard work and natural aptitudinous. And I earned all of my medals, too. I went to every single class for them. I'm tired now, go away."