Evolution and Biblical Timelines

by Noah Zarkian

It's a done deal that evolution happened, the Earth didn't pop into existance 6,000 years ago. But, that doesn't mean dinosaurs were not around in biblical times! Scholars tell us that life-expectancy changed dramatically after the Great Flood. Though figuring the Earth's age by reverse-engineering biblical lineage references in Genesis based on today's post-flood lifespans would put the Earth at 6000 yrs old, if one opens one's mind to His Truth, all those begats could have been a 100,000 years each! That would prove science supports the Bible, and Jesus died for our sins! Our sins are going to Heaven! Science! Bible! In synch! Irrefutable! The picture above is just another evidence of truth! And you can wear it! See below!

Image ©vicevoices 2008. (Available on t-shirts 'n stuff here!)

A Huckford Retreat

Roiders: As George Bush has Crawford Ranch in Texas, Mike Huckabee has Huckford Chalet in Appalachia. Here we see Mike "of the Beast" in front of Huckford, having just returned from a healthy jog with his dog, "Black." Now, Black ain't too happy here, having lost one of his shoes. Checking his time, Mike is pleased!


Here we find Mike dispensing his citified wisdom on the subject of evolution. Nobody can argue with Mike, and evolution is found to be lacking in scientific deficiency, 'round these parts!


Here we see Mike returning to the roots of his musical talent. What? You thought he used to be in Led Zeppling? And he's a mighty fine picker for sure!


Here's Mike with the twins, after a bit of a disagreement with the local authorities. Not optiminal for publickity, but, it's the only shot we got with the brothers all in one place! That's Carl (the "handsome one") on the left, Earl (the "Earl of Hurl") in the middle, and Mike ("The Mike of the Beast") there on the right, as usual. You can add your own caption if you want, but what Mike was really sayin' was, "This Photographer said he wasn't gonna vote for me," and the twins don't cottom much to Librals or smart-asses!

And that was the last photo I received from Ansel, my photographer on this assignment to Huckford. There may be more, but Ansel seems to have gone incognito, or something. More when he gets back in touch. Peace and happiness out!